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Lindenlea
30th December 2011, 19:36
My Husband is 37, we have 2 childen 13 & 10 - We were diagnosed in March 2009, we are lucky because we are progressing slowly, however the mood swings are causing so many difficulties...
Help any advice !!

Robyn Copley-Hirst
3rd January 2012, 12:43
Hi Lindenlea,

I hope you get some advice off other carers on the forum. Do feel free to call our Connect helpline to talk through your feelings as a carer, or for your husband to call to talk through anything he may wish. The number is 08457 626262 and they'll be happy to lend an ear and whatever advice they can offer.

http://www.mndassociation.org/life_with_mnd/mnd_connect.html

I hope this helps,

Robyn

john
3rd January 2012, 14:31
Hi Lindenlea,
Regarding mood swings I am afraid they understandably come with the territory. I would suggest you have a chat with your doctor or long term NHS case worker. My wife ,Irene, starts her day with citalopram which seems to help keep her anxiety at bay . She seems to have a day time low around 5pm each day and so we know it is a time to avoid anything that may create stress for her but otherwise she seems fine all day.
Recent interventions that seem to work for Irene have been aromatherapy, which she finds very relaxing arranged through the local branch of Macmillan nurses but delivered by a local hospice, and a Christmas gift of a genie head massager. Sounds stupid I know but it is a product which you will find if you google it costing 4 or 5 pounds. It is simple but effective. This morning we had Irene's long term care nurse visiting and conversation got around to something that Irene found upsetting and tears started to flow. Consoling her ordinarily only seems to increase the upset so I brought the head massager into play. Within minutes she was relaxed and laughing - unbelievable - so simple yet so effective. If it doesn't work on him then try it on yourself!! A couple of suggestions that may help. Good luck.

John

miranda
3rd January 2012, 15:04
Hi Lindenlea. Is your husband having mood swings or does he have uncontrollable bouts of tears and/or laughter? This emotional lability affects many of us with MND. It is so frustrating and so difficult to explain that tears do not mean I am sad or depressed and laughter is not always about something funny. I wish I could make this easier for people to understand - family and friends are used to it now but it still embarrasses me. I can sob over something hardly emotional on TV and so tend to avoid programmes that might set me off! Even someone winning a quiz does it - so goodness knows what I will be like over the Olympics. Hope you get some help to cope with your situation.

Lindenlea
3rd January 2012, 20:59
Thank you !!
He's very angry with the fact that MND has chosen him/us, He puts on this amazing brave face in front of his Mum & Dad etc, as his carer I get most of his anger, some days honestly I don't do anything right. We are lucky we have needed no help, but we are now at a point a wheel chair would be helpful and a move downstairs would be good, but denial and stubbiness has got him this far.

Mata
9th January 2012, 09:29
Thank you !!
He's very angry with the fact that MND has chosen him/us, He puts on this amazing brave face in front of his Mum & Dad etc, as his carer I get most of his anger, some days honestly I don't do anything right. We are lucky we have needed no help, but we are now at a point a wheel chair would be helpful and a move downstairs would be good, but denial and stubbiness has got him this far.

I think we've all been there as carers, esp the brave face to everyone else and anger behind closed doors. And I understand about the denial and stubborness as my mum was stubborn enough before the MND let alone since!

In my mum's case I did it bit by bit as even simple things like putting a non-slip mat on the tray she eats her supper on was a challenge. I did that by buying the stuff on a day I was going to eat with her, letting my plate slip off the tray and then going to get the stuff from the car and putting it on my tray. When I went home I left it on the tray and the next time I went she was using it herself.

As for the wheelchair, the physio organised one for me which sat in the garage for a bit. Then we started taking it with us when doing longer trips but mum still refused to use it. Eventually there was a trip when she was too tired to get back to the car so I went to get it and after that she agreed we could use it as walking frame with her pushing it around the shops. Over time she started using it more and more and now she is perfectly happy to have it in the house or in the car when we travel. As far as the bed downstairs goes the physio got a rise recliner for my mum which was put in the sitting room. On the days she can't get up the stairs, she sleeps in that (which horrifies the physio). The idea was that when that was happening more often we would offer to switch the chair for the bed. It isn't going to happen now as mum has chosen to go into a nursing home but I know we could have made it work.

Bels
27th January 2012, 17:00
Hi John,

I read your post mentionning a genie head massager a couple of weeks ago and thought I would buy one for my Mum. She loves massages etc. I am up visiting for the first time this weekend and brought it up. What a massive success, Mum absolutely loves it. Thanks for the tip.

Belsxx

john
27th January 2012, 23:10
Hi Bels,
Pleased to hear it. Ours is still in daily use after a month and never fails to raise a smile. The best 5 ever spent.

John

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