View Full Version : It getting hard

13th June 2012, 22:29
So, I havent been on here for a while.
Scared to come on here again I guess.
Well my dad is so ill at the moment, every day hes getting worse and im getting home and mums mentioning that he hasnt been very well,or the doctor has been out again. Its just one constant battle that im struggling to fight anymore :(
I have a younger sister and she is not one help at all, she doesnt think before she speaks sunday she came out with comment of when we go to dads funeral.... woo woo hold on there what the f*** do you think you are talking about, NEVER EVER think like that until we absolutely have to!!She can think it all she wants but dont ever say it! She has started to drive a wedge between, me n my mum because she is craving so much attention from my mum but obviously my dad has her attention. I try and help as muc as I can but my dad doesnt like anyone else doing anything, he wont let anyway do the flush to his food peg, he is just about letting me empty his cathita (Not sure how it is spelt) but I cant help as oftern as I like because I have to work., It is becoming a living nightmare living at home at the moment.
Im worrying about my dad never seeing his grandkids (when i decide o have them) or even see me walk down the isle. Thats the thought that hurts the most not being able to give him grandkids yet or even walk down the isle. I have a friend that has asked me to move in with him but its in Manchester but I live down South, but im not sure if I can leave my dad, but can I put my life on hold? I hardly ever go out im too scared to :(
Sorry for this long post. Needed to get this off my chest.

My appoligses again.


14th June 2012, 00:52
Never apologise for having a rant, dont forget that MND connect are also available if you need to speak to someone.

Try not to be angry with your sister as it will only hurt you as anger can be destructive. Remember that everyone deals with MND and the terminal nature of the disease differently, maybe if she needs to speak about funeral planning you could ask her nicely to have those conversations when you are not around.

And about the future, perhaps you would find it useful to talk through things with someone as there is obviously no right or wrong answer and i am sure in time you will find the right answer to your question. If your friend is understanding there could perhaps be ways in which you could still see each other but not move 3/4 way across the country. I think supporting a family member with MND especially if you live with them or are one of the main carers there will be many things that will end up being put on hold and only you will know what you can put on hold and what you can't. I am sure whatver choice you make it won't be easy but i am sure however it turns out you will be able to find ways to help your mum and dad

take care


Robyn Copley-Hirst
14th June 2012, 11:11
Hi Parker,

If you do want to speak to someone the Connect number is 08457 626262. You are very welcome to call us to talk about how you're feeling as well as any practical advice we can give you.

Lucy is right about there being no right or wrong way to deal with, or feel about, what you're going through, everyone reacts differently - but the forum is here for you to talk all you want, as are the Connect team - no apologies needed.

Best Wishes,


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