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Thread: Grieving

  1. #1
    Forum Member Davec's Avatar
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    Grieving

    i cannot find a thread that is specifically about grieving, nor can I find one that would let us know of when our dear ones departted! Any thoughts? I will if you agree start them for us all!
    “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”

  2. #2
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    Good idea, we all grieve in different ways and so I think it would be helpful to many. And a place where people that have lost loved ones to MND could come together and share their thoughts, feelings and emotions.
    It does seem that when people on here lose loved ones they feel possibly they don't belong here and yet they have made friends and confided in so many on here.
    springtime
    Evil triumphs when good men stand by and do nothing.

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    Hi Dave, we all cope with grieving differently. I found that when I lost my first husband to brain tumours 10 years ago, I never felt I could talk or cry in front of my sons and family as It would trigger their emotions, consequently I put in a brave face and grieved alone but it would have been so nice to have chatted to people on a site such as this who were going through the same thing, it is easier sometimes to put down on paper your feelings to strangers than face to face. I already feel I have made friends on this site and I hope you will continue to log on and get the anger you must feel at losing your wife to this awful disease out of your system and go forward with your wife's love in your heart and her smile in your eyes as she would have wanted you too. X

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    Dear Dave, I think this is a good thread to start as there are many of us who are in the early stages of grieving but also others that are further on but I am sure all of us have some input.

    For me it is the long days, I was Ed's only carer and my day started at 5.30 and did not end until after 10 p.m. Like you an undisturbed nights sleep was something I had done without for so long that I still wake many times during the night. I can't say that I feel much better as from when he passed away In December, but you tend to put a front up to try to deal with it in your own way. There are many days that I want to shut the curttains and stay in bed, and others when I go out in the sunshine but feel so sad that I can share it with Ed.

    I dip in and out of the forum as some days it is too painful. Please keep on posting and starting threads you are both very much loved on this forum. Diane

  5. #5
    Forum Member Davec's Avatar
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    I am a very early stage, day 1, and I am still confused with my emotions, the feeling of relief for Sharyn being at peace is outweighing the one of grief!
    She told me not to mope and she was always wiser than I was!
    When the doctor brought round the death certificate I did well up, whether that envelope made her death seem final I am not to sure, I believe it was because of our incredible doctor cared so much for my Sharyn
    I have spent the afternoon with my trainers partner, who is a few weeks pregnant and she and I walked arm in arm along the beach front! I showed Sharyn 3 days ago the scan picture and I am sure she smiled!
    I have taken back all the Macmillan equipment and the NHS have collected the bed, there is now no reminder and it is now back to how Sharyn had it before. I pretend she is out shopping and will be home soon! It helps

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    Dave, grief takes you places you never knew existed. Three weeks after Bill died, I went back to work, which was 25 minutes away in the car. Three or four times, I found myself back home in the drive at lunchtime - and I had no clue how I had got there! I just wanted to be near him, even if I knew in my heart he wasn't there any more! Just get out of bed in the morning, remember to breathe, put one foot in front of the other.............and the rest will follow! Talk if you want to talk, hibernate if you want to hibernate........just let your grief go where it wants. We are all here for you Much love Joycie xx

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    Forum Member Nettie B's Avatar
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    Dave. When my lovely Mum died suddenly and tragically over 30 years ago I wasn't able to grieve. I had a full time job and my daughters to prioritise. I was even sent to do an Xray on the same ward on which she died 3 days after her death! I still suffer repercussions of that dreadful time. Do give yourself the luxury of taking as much time as you need. Let no one rush you and don't rush yourself. You've been through such a lot and you need to be really kind and gentle with yourself. XX

  8. #8
    Forum Member Davec's Avatar
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    today I had to register the death of Sharyn! All computerised except when it came to sign the form, who uses a proper ink pen nowadays!
    Its the little things that are setting me crying,, a smell of perfume or even a daisy! I am keeping myself busy and I am eating properly! The stillness in the house is getting easier as I sing our favourite songs,! All helps

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    Dave. As you know I'm four months from losing my mum to MND. Most days now I can talk about her and what she went through without crying but yesterday was difficult because it was Mothers Day. Just keep doing what you're doing at this difficult time. Sharyn would want you to smile again.

  10. #10
    Forum Member Davec's Avatar
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    I am so tired! Is this part of the grieving process or is my body finally releasing the stress?

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