Big Gee's music thread

[Kayleigh]

Fairy enough Ellie!

This year I have 2 options for serving up my fixed menu of festive fun.

OPTION 1 (Cracker of an Advent Calendar):-

I could keep my Christmas jokes wrapped up until the 1st of Decem-myrrh.

And I would be as good as Gold (and thrice as Wise) by asking my postman, Mr Frank Insense, to deliver just one joke each day, so that I could make a daily Christmas posting of a joke onto the forum's 'Festive Advent Calendar thread'.

My s-elf, I would never open any of my calendar in advance, anyway. But if I used my 'mince pies' to take a sneaky peak, I could get put on Santa's naughty list or even candy caned by Frosty the Snowman! LOL - and I wouldn't want my angelic halo to slip off into my Christmas pudding mix (which could result in a rather halogenous and salty tasting pud, if the halo reacted with the sixpence!) LOL

I snow that my 'Cracker of an Advent Calendar' wouldn't be as sweet as a Cadbury's one - but mine would be free of all delivery charges and it would avoid family members sleighing each other over who is going to be gifted with the daily chocolate star or snowflake.

OPTION 2 (Christmas Selection Box of Puns and Jokes):-

I could hide my festive jokes in Santa's Sack until after Terry's annual unveiling of his 'Festive Avatar'?? . . that date is usually a Secret Santa - and I promise not to display my 'seasonal avatar' until you reveal yours TC!

.... Anyway, all people want to do at Christmas is indirectly run up my credit card bills, demolish all my chocolate log and get tipsy on my Tia Maria! - Bah humbug!! LOL.. and Never Mind the Presents LOL ...
http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bLZVcKgCylE

Pre-seasonal Greetings!

Love,
Kayleigh x

[Kayleigh]

Doc, I can't stop singing Green Green Grass of Home.
It sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.
Is it common?
it's not unusual.....

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hxiHrN-5dOQ

... and it wouldn't be unusual to be a fan of this Green Green Grass ...but would you prefer it in Tom's or Elvis's green pastures??....

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gx9ytubmh-U

...however, you might think the Grass is Greener on the other side??

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=k07FfEBgfmA

Love,
Kayleigh

[Kayleigh]

I must confess to never seeing an episode of bay watch, something to do with lifeguards!!!

Spice Girls - no comment.

Love,
Barry

Hi Barry,

I thought I'd reply to your post with a smidgen of my sweet memories and some even sweeter merry melodies. Hopefully they will be amusing to your eyes and sweet music to your ears (rather than an annoying attack on all your senses! LOL).

I didn't watch Baywatch much - although it was a very popular TV show in the '80s and it did offer a colossal candy-cart of eye-candy for its viewers (including Sugar Daddies and Cougars! LOL):-

A taster of vintage 1980's American cheese ...LOL...
http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O0nqwgu_Us4

I was a fan of David Hassellhof in Knight Rider - and not only is he still a popular heart-throb, apparently he's a successful popstar too (particularly in Germany):-

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ybwY-YGTurQ

However, these 'hunnies' don't appear to be very attracted to The Hoff"s honey trap!! ..... LOL. ....

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dm7jEA3frY4

Love
Kayleigh

P.S.....

I'm not surprised the Spice Girls don't appeal to you - but perhaps these Sweet Girls will press the right buttons?..LOL...

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=D_Us2oVejmU

[Barry52]

Hi Kayleigh,

I enjoyed knight rider and who would have thought back then that current cars do all the magic they portrayed. I think DH should stick to acting however the lyrics in “get into my car” made me laugh.

Love,
Barry

[Terry]

Just I the gym drinking coffee and playing Yesterday and then Can't Buy Me Love by the Beatles.

Then I thought of this one especially for Judy.

https://youtu.be/FhXU8c8qwXs gets a bit loud after 3 minutes in.

Love Terry

[Gillette]

Hi Kayleigh,

I enjoyed knight rider and who would have thought back then that current cars do all the magic they portrayed. I think DH should stick to acting however the lyrics in “get into my car” made me laugh.

Love,
Barry

It reminded me of this song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnBM4TV6JCU

[Kayleigh]

Hi Kayleigh,

I enjoyed knight rider and who would have thought back then that current cars do all the magic they portrayed. I think DH should stick to acting however the lyrics in “get into my car” made me laugh.

Love,
Barry

The Hoff might find it difficult to get acting parts because he might not be as popular as he thought?? LOL

Apparently, The Hoff thinks that the Berlin Wall came down quickly because of him.
So true! It was taken down rapidly - because everyone wanted to escape from his singing! LOL

And at a German beer festival recently...
The Hoff we went off in a hoff,
when some fans gave him the brush-hoff,
'to follow the bear' (the famous Meister Hof)!

Then there was a stand-hoff ...
when The Hoff's music was turned-hoff,
because he hadn't settled the bar-tab (for all he had schoffed),
but 'hofficially' the Hoff had already paid it hoff!!

And it all kicked-hoff ...
when The Hoff claimed the bar was a rip-hoff,
that sold lager that was obviously knock-hoff,
and which lorry had that bear fallen hoff the back hoff??

The Hoff said he wouldn't return - not even for thoffee,
or their hot hofferings of free refills of choffee,
and didn't they know that if it wasn't for the Hoff,
the Berlin Wall wouldn't hoff come down so quickly??

He could hoff hoffensively told them all to **** off,
but 'hofficially' he politely
waved and spun-hoff,
'unhofficially' to a campsite near Dusseldhoff ...

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1XNvdk6Zpbc

and then The Hoff strutted hoff to a dance-hoff!! ....

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zARl1jRDwY8

I hope you've enjoyed today's hoffer of humour and hopefully the links to the video-clips weren't a Hassel and they went on and Hoff when they were supposed to.

Love to everyone,
Kayleigh x

[Kayleigh]

P.S Sorry, at first I must hoff put the wrong video-links on my post! - but it was no hassel for me to change them and the correct links are there now!

[Barry52]

Hi Dina

I too remember this song and the lyrics are cheesy.

Kayleigh you should be writing scripts for a tv comedy as you have a talent with words. Are you related to either of the great pair Galton and Simpson?

Love
Barry

[Gillette]

My carers and I have been having a laugh this afternoon while they were trying get me straight in bed. We’ve decided that this is our theme tune:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUT5rEU6pqM

[ccinjersey]

LOL

Love that song Dina. If you're going to shake your hips that's the only way to do it !

CCxox

[Gillette]

LOL

Love that song Dina. If you're going to shake your hips that's the only way to do it !

CCxox

Well, my carers spend a lot of time shaking my hips to get me in the right position and it has been said that my hips move better than Shakira’s! (Well, someone could have said it. )

[Kayleigh]

While Shakira was shakin' her 'assets', 'Shaky' was shakin' his house down LOL.....

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CgoDYK3IlGg

Love
Kayleigh x

[Kayleigh]

... and AInsley & Natalie were shakin' their booty, rattlin' their rib-cage and rollin' their eyes (and ears, and nose and mouth) ... LOL ....

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=e-aF3MsNScY

[Kayleigh]

... then Ball said to Cannon "Rock on Tommy" ...

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Uh9ikAcVblA

and the audience were so shook-up, from rockin' and rollin' in the aisles, they asked The Jacksons to shake their bodies down ... LOL ...

http://https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Am70KRnUL3k

Love
'Catapult Kayleigh' x

... although, last time I was Cannon and Ball's warm-up act ... I was supposed to fire-up the audience with enthusiasm, before the main act - but my jokes fizzled-out and fell flat before they had even reached the back of the crowd!

And although Cannon & Ball's gags are like dynamite (never failing to bring the house down with repeated rounds of applause), mine went up in smoke, then my knees went to jelly - and my puns got custard pied! LOL

Despite, all the Balls-ups, Cannon offered me a dynamic re-launch as 'Cross-bow Kayleigh' - but, unfortunately, all those custard pies had made me cross-eyed and the only bow I could find was the one in my hair! LOL