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Thread: Lost my dad

  1. #1

    Lost my dad

    Dear all,

    The last time I posted on these forums was 13th March, regarding whether my dad's needs could be met if he were to be sent home from hospital, which he desperately wanted, despite my mum finding it very difficult to look after him. On 19th March, he passed away in hospital. It's been over a month now and I feel it necessary to continue logging in to these forums. I can't quite believe he is gone and am left with so many unanswerable questions regarding this horrible illness which changed the calm, witty engineer that my dad was into someone who feared constantly and couldn't move, speak or swallow. I am left with a hole in my life and my heart, and am dreadfully sad for my mum, who has lost the love of her life.

    I know my dad was a lurker on these forums and got a great deal of hope and inspiration from them. I am determined to make something positive result from his illness, as I know he would have wanted. In addition to the joy and kindness he brought to my life, he has left me with a determination to help people with MND that will never diminish. I am one of a very small group of people who have loved and lost someone with MND and will forever be part of this group. My dad's illness has given me a new sense of purpose, although I haven't quite finetuned what that is yet. I will volunteer for MNDA in time, and do what I possibly can to fight this.

    Much love to those suffering from MND and their carers and loved ones. You have my love and respect forever.

  2. #2
    Forum Member Ellie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    I am so sorry for your loss.

    Heartfelt condolences to you and your mum.

    Look after yourself and give yourself time to grieve.

    Love and hugs,
    ​Diagnosed 03/2007. Sporadic Definite ALS/MND Limb Onset.
    Eye gaze user - No working limbs - No speech - Feeding tube - Overnight NIV.

  3. #3
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Hi goldilockz
    I am so sorry to hear of your dad passing . At least he will be in peace now and out of the suffering . I admire you for turning his death into something positive and wanting to help MND sufferers. Good luck with whatever you choose to do.
    Take care of yourself and your mum.
    Best wishes
    Love Chris

  4. #4
    Forum Member Tim-griffiths's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    Lambourn Berkshire england
    Hi Goldilocks
    I am so sorry to hear of your dad's passing away, both you and you mum please accept my deepest sympathy and condolences.

  5. #5
    Forum Member Terry's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Hi Goldilocks;

    So sorry for you and your families great lose and I hope you can remember the good times.

    It is pleasing to us that you plan to help people like us. Please update us when you know what direction you are going in.

    Love Terry

  6. #6
    Forum Member Barry52's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Newark on Trent
    Hello Goldilocks,

    I am sorry to hear about your dad and my condolences go out to you and your Mum. It never ceases to amaze me how many people like yourself, having been touched by MND, want to help others living with it. Good luck with whatever you get involved with and as a father of 2 girls I know your dad will be looking down proudly.

    Iím going to do this even if it kills me!

  7. #7
    Thank you all so much for your kind words. Watching my dad deteriorate is the most difficult and humbling experience I have ever encountered. I remember my mum reading a post on the forum and remarking that MND is a kind person's disease, and we all agreed. My dad had such a strength and positivity that was present until the final week of his life, when he seemed defeated. I'm glad this was only a short time though and didn't define him. The help and support we have received from MNDA and MND Scotland (my family are from Glasgow) is truly astonishing. Such kindness, compassion and humility. I feel fortunate to be physically able to help others in the way my family has been helped by volunteers and befrienders. Much love to you all, this community is so vibrant and positive in the face of such a baffling illness xxx

  8. #8
    Forum Member Sueb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Hello Goldilocks

    So sorry to hear of your families loss. Good luck with your volunteering.

    Sue x

  9. #9
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Cambridge UK
    So sorry to hear the sad news of your dad's passing. You are in my thoughts X

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