Things have been going pretty well for awhile. Housemate and I have been talking normally, hanging out from time to time. I've been more 'touchy feely' and emotionally supportive of her, been there when she needed me.
Then yesterday, I removed the polish from her toenails, and trimmed them back (they were getting quite long). Her parents arrived part way through the task, so I worked around them and joined in with the light hearted conversation. I'm as much a part of their family as I've ever been with my own, and consider myself quite close to her parents.
So when I took the polish off her nails, and saw that they were a brown/yellow colour, I expressed my concern. As the housemate's mum is an ex-nurse, seemed logical to ask for her opinion. But, according to the housemate this morning, I did that all wrong. I 'freaked out' (apparently) and didn't warn the housemate before asking her mum. She says I offended both her and her mum. *rolls eyes* (just texted her mum, and she wasn't offended and didn't realise her daughter was)
I just give up. I can't do or say anything right these days. Before she had a go at me for the toenail thing, she got mad at me for 'walking off' after helping her carer with the bed pan. This is one of her major complaints, that I leave before the job is done. I don't. I help out with all those things that require 2 people, and often continue helping out till the job is entirely done. But, sometimes, if I have something else going on, I'll help out with the two person aspect, check with the carer if they need further help, then go on with what I was doing. But NOOOOO, apparently that's not what I'm supposed to do.
Bloody cow.
I started job hunting today. The level of professional care she has is pretty good, and I'm confident she can make it through the day OK without me here. OK, she may have to wait a bit to use the bed pan, but am sure she'll survive. I need to generate some money, can't live on £0.68 / hour much longer.
And yes, if you notice, 'my best friend' has been downgraded to 'the housemate'. She still is my best friend, just really pissed me off today.
Sorry, seems all I do is rant.
Also, I am trying really hard to eat healthy and walk every day. And I get on a really good track for 3 or 4 days. Eating things like salad, veg, fruit - you know, all the healthy things. And then she goes off on me, and I don't care any more. I lose all desire to be healthy. This afternoon, I waked down to the corner shop and got 2 cans of Mt Dew and a large hazelnut chocolate bar, in the rain. I am going to lose SO MUCH weight after she kicks the bucket, it's going to be unreal.
Pen
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