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Thread: Meltdown

  1. #21
    Forum Member Lynne K's Avatar
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    Thanks Terry and Ellie. No respite chance at all. I encourage him to keep up his playing in music sessions, mostly Irish Trad.' He always comes back happy and much easier to get along with. He decided to not go out on Tuesday this week saying it was so he could look after me, but their was footy on so I'm not convinced. Anyway whenever he suggests staying in for me I tell him no need to and that it's more important that he keeps happy. He knows how I feel about his rants. I enjoy the couple of hours break too. I can watch some Netflix that he wouldn't be interested in.

    I looked after him and his two kids (I could write a book about that) shortly after we got together as he'd had a breakdown. I was always patient and attentive, gave him space when he needed it. I put up with his kids icy attitude to me aware that they'd understandably have preferred their mum (who'd left them all 2 years before I was on the scene). Can you see why I'm disappointed and fearful? Lynne
    Last edited by Lynne K; 5th May 2019 at 17:22.
    ALS diagnosed November 2017, limb onset. For the 4 yrs previously I was losing my ballance.
    I'm staying positive and taking each day as it comes.

  2. #22
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    Hi Lynne,

    So sorry for your situation...Life is so unfair and I totally understand why you have had a meltdown. I can see why you are fearful and frustrated.

    I am sure we all have a panic about the future sometimes and an atmosphere at home is enough to set one off. It's really hard to pull yourself up then and get back on an even keel.

    Hopefully, you will feel better tomorrow as it is another day !

    Thinking of you and sending hugs,
    Love Debbie x

  3. #23
    Forum Member Lynne K's Avatar
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    Thanks Debbie x
    ALS diagnosed November 2017, limb onset. For the 4 yrs previously I was losing my ballance.
    I'm staying positive and taking each day as it comes.

  4. #24
    Forum Member Gillette's Avatar
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    Oh, Lynne, I'm so sorry you had such a sh*tty time with your husband. I hope the atmosphere between you is easier now. I can understand you feeling concerned for the future but please try not to worry about it - try to take things one day at a time. I'm sending you some virtual hugs as my arms aren't quite long enough to reach your side of Radcliffe. ((((()))))
    Dina


    Trying to keep positive, but not always managing.

  5. #25
    Forum Member Kayleigh's Avatar
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    Hi Lynne,

    Sorry to hear that things have been particularly difficult for you at home.

    I agree with you, that it is good to have time apart every now and again. It sounds like you have tried to encourage your husband to socialise with his friends, so that you can have a break from each other sometimes - but perhaps he worries about leaving you at home by youself, in case you were to have a fall?

    There are personal alarms we can get and sometimes OTs can provide them - if you were to get one, then perhaps that would put your husband's mind at rest a bit about you being at home without him? (Just a thought, and you might already have one anyway.)

    I'm with you about needing some 'me time' every now and then - especially so that we can watch what we want on TV in peace! - after all, I don't think there are many husbands and wives who have the same taste in TV programmes!

    Hopefully you both had a lovely time when you were away on holiday recently. It could just be a case of him having the post-holiday blues for a short while (not that he should be taking things out on you!).

    I hope tomorrow is a better day for you and that the situation improves very soon.

    Love and hugs,
    Kayleigh x
    Last edited by Kayleigh; 6th May 2019 at 00:00.
    We are a fabulous forum family - the precious bond we all share is powerful and strong!

  6. #26
    Forum Member Lynne K's Avatar
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    Hi Kayleigh. Today got better as it went on. Some talking done and for a change he didn't kick off when I explained. No apology but quietly listened.

    When he goes out I make sure that my mobile is always either in my pocket or in my walker so if I fall I can contact him. He's only half an hour away sometimes 45 minutes sometimes and an hour and a half the furthest away. Thanks for your message. Lynne
    ALS diagnosed November 2017, limb onset. For the 4 yrs previously I was losing my ballance.
    I'm staying positive and taking each day as it comes.

  7. #27
    Forum Member Gillette's Avatar
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    Hi Lynne, I'm glad things have improved for you today and I hope tomorrow gets even better.

    My partner has had a bad day today, which has made him grumpy. He apologised over dinner but the grumps continued after we had eaten. He is feeling overwhelmed but rejects anything and everything I try to do to ease the burden.
    Dina


    Trying to keep positive, but not always managing.

  8. #28
    Forum Member Kayleigh's Avatar
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    I'm glad you had a good day Lynne and that your husband listened to your side of things without getting argumentative.

    Sorry to hear that things didn't go so well with your partner today, Dina. Sometimes, if they are in a bad mood, nothing anyone says is going to make them feel better about things.

    I suppose it's a case of taking one day at a time and trying to make the best of things - while hopefully being kind to ourselves and each other!

    Love and hugs
    Kayleigh xx
    Last edited by Kayleigh; 7th May 2019 at 01:16.
    We are a fabulous forum family - the precious bond we all share is powerful and strong!

  9. #29
    Forum Member Gillette's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kayleigh View Post
    Sorry to hear that things didn't go so well with your partner today, Dina. Sometimes, if they are in a bad mood, nothing anyone says is going to make them feel better about things.
    Love and hugs
    Kayleigh xx
    You're right, of course, Kayleigh. I just don't feel like dealing with his negativity at the moment.
    Dina


    Trying to keep positive, but not always managing.

  10. #30
    Forum Member Lynne K's Avatar
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    Well said Kayleigh, and thanks, Lynne x
    ALS diagnosed November 2017, limb onset. For the 4 yrs previously I was losing my ballance.
    I'm staying positive and taking each day as it comes.

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