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Thread: Heartbroken

  1. #1
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    Heartbroken

    Hi
    I am heartbroken to announce that my lovely Husband Mick passed suddenly and unexpectedly yesterday. His walking at got really bad and his head was on his chest. He had had 4 falls in the last 2 weeks. His OT was coming yesterday so I came home at 10am for the appt.They discussed a walker and a hoist to get him up, we also talked about going through the MND forum to fast track our stair lift. Knowing that he would want to look at our bed I opened the bedroom curtains and the window. On my way back to work I questioned whether I had closed them. There is only about 6inch between end of the bed and the wall so I sidled through and Mick had the side near bedroom door. I came home at 4.40pm and the door was locked and he wasnt in his recliner. I went upstairs and bedroom door was open. I looked on the bed and thought he must be out back. When I turned he had fallen between bed and the wall, so was partly on bed and stuck in space. He hadnt pressed his alert. I could see he had gone. I feel like I have killed him. He probably fell and couldnt breathe. His chest was bad. I am heartbroken and it wont sink in

  2. #2
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    Oh Shrew, of course you aren't responsible. You really don't know what happened. You are still in shock. Even when you know it is going to happen death it is always a shock. You cared for your husband so lovingly and he will have known how much you loved him.
    I will think of you and send you lots of love. Take care.
    Ann x

  3. #3
    Forum Member Ellie's Avatar
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    Oh no Shrew, I am so shocked at reading this. I am absolutely heartbroken for you as I know Mick was your world...

    I cannot comprehend the turmoil you're in but please, please don't think you were a factor in Mick's death.

    Please accept my deepest and heartfelt condolences.

    RIP Mick.

    Love Ellie.
    ​Diagnosed 03/2007. Sporadic Definite ALS/MND Limb Onset.
    Eye gaze user - No working limbs - No speech - Feeding tube - Overnight NIV.

  4. #4
    Forum Member Boiler68's Avatar
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    Oh no Shrew..i’m so terribly sorry for you..please please don’t blame yourself..your husband would not want you to blame yourself. It’s obvious how much you loved him dearly. I don’t know what else to say really but hope that you can feel the love we all send you at this awful time.
    Rest peacefully Mick.

    Xxx

  5. #5
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    My heartfelt sympathy xx
    Olivia.

  6. #6
    Forum Member Kayleigh's Avatar
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    Dear Shrew,

    I'm extremely sorry to hear such sad news about Mick.

    Please don't think that it was your fault that he passed when he did. It definitely wasn't your fault that Mick had reached his time to drift away with the angels.

    Mick always knew you loved him with all of your heart, just as much as he loved you. He wouldn't want you to feel guilty about anything.

    You are an extremely kind and caring lady and you always looked after Mick lovingly and with the utmost care. Please don't blame yourself for anything.

    I wish I could do more for you than just post this message. My thoughts are with you. Please take care of yourself and I hope you have family and friends to support and comfort you.

    Rest in peace Mick.

    Thinking of you Shrew and sending you lots of love and hugs,
    Kayleigh xx
    Last edited by Kayleigh; 4th July 2019 at 18:10.

  7. #7
    Forum Member Terry's Avatar
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    So sorry Shrew,

    Shocked, heartbroken do say little about how you feel. Mick was big part of the forum and will be sadly missed.

    Sorry for you that you found him that way, Mnd people all take risks, especially with falling. I often look at my fire place with raised ball corners and think that I should cover them but where do you stop. There are so many risks.

    RIP Mick

    Terry

  8. #8
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    Condolences,
    I joined yesterday, so we haven't shared any posts. But all us newbies wish you well.
    Very sad for your loss,
    Ben.

  9. #9
    Forum Member nunhead_man's Avatar
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    Shrew, I am so sorry to hear this and I am not surprised that you are heartbroken and as is said above, Mick will be sorely missed.

    Also, you must not think that you are yourself responsible - each of us is responsible for ourselves and whilst obviously we try to help others as much as we can, beyond a certain point, there is nothing we can do

    Warmly
    Warmly


    Andy

    ​Diagnosed 03/2015. Limb onset (arm) sporadic ALS/MND.
    MND hitting - now 50% left arm and 90% right arm, plus other bits including left shoulder

  10. #10
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    Oh Shrew, I am so very sorry for the loss of your beloved Mick.

    You must be so shocked by the suddenness but you must not blame yourself in any way. It's obvious how much you loved Mick and you cared for him with absolute devotion.

    I hope you have love and support around you from friends and family.

    RIP Mick.
    Thinking of you, Shrew
    Love Debbie x

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