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    First Christmas

    Hi Everyone,

    It's been quite some time since I've had chance to come on the forum. I must say, I am incredibly saddened to hear of so many 'familiar faces' that are no longer with us.
    I hope the rest of you are doing as well as you possibly can (and a very Merry Christmas to you all!)
    I just really wanted to pop my head in and say hello
    Things have been quite difficult for me, emotionally, since around September- seems MND really took a hit, but decided to wait a few months after Gran's passing to rear it's ugly head. I'd been prescribed some beta-blockers to control some panic attacks and general anxiety that seemed to be with me constantly- things are only just starting to get better for me now (annoyingly, it's all health-anxiety-related; not surprising, under the circumstances). I was on the waiting list for CBT via the NHS, but couldn't wait, so I attempted to apply the same techniques by myself- luckily, it seems to have really helped and I no longer feel I need the help of a professional (yay).
    It's very strange, but my mind doesn't seem to let me think about Gran very often- I don't know whether it's because the experience of losing her was just too traumatic for my mind to handle or whether it's because I spent so long in the anticipatory grief state that my mind has just said 'enough'. I'm sure, with time, I'll be able to 'let' myself think about her a lot more. Which brings us nicely into Christmas- it was always Gran's favourite time of year. She would decorate her house like a grotto, feed mountains of food to any guest that arrived and bought so many thoughtful gifts for her friends and family. I really wanted to celebrate this year, in her memory, and go all-out with the decorations, but a surprise (happy) twist in the year hasn't made it possible.
    I'm currently sat at my dining room table (I'm meant to be working, but would rather talk to you lovely people!), surrounded by boxes!
    My fiancé and I were planning on buying a house this year, having saved very hard for the last 4 years. Well, in September, we finally found one that we love!
    It's a new build, on the border of the Cotswolds, and we've been given a fixed date for completion next Friday Nice Christmas present, for sure!
    In hindsight, it probably wasn't the smartest idea for us, having both recently been through the losses of close family members (Gran on my side and my fiancé's Dad died suddenly in June), to go through the utter stress that is involved with a house purchase. However, we were both of the opinion that, considering we've both had a really rubbish time of it this year (and a couple of years before that, due to my Mum having passed away, too), we just had to finish this year on a high (start next year as we mean to go on, kind of thing).
    I'm sure, given the circumstances, Gran wouldn't have minded my omitting to put the Christmas tree up, this year (we're having double-Christmas next year, to make up for it!)
    As expected, none of the other family members have been in touch this year- I am not giving any of them my new address and I will be omitting them from my life completely (social media, phone and such-like). I'm only surrounding myself with positive, lovely people, from now on
    I'd love to hear from you all- please do let me know how you're all getting on <3

    Chrissie xx
    "This, too, shall pass"

    #2
    Hi Chrissie. In only have seven left of my immediate family including both parents and all grandparents. I will be celebrating Xmas on my own for the umpteenth time. Yes the future is bleak but how lucky are we know we are on a time limit. Have you got your Bucket list sorted or just do what you want to do and damn the consequences. 😊x

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by matthew55 View Post
      Hi Chrissie. In only have seven left of my immediate family including both parents and all grandparents. I will be celebrating Xmas on my own for the umpteenth time. Yes the future is bleak but how lucky are we know we are on a time limit. Have you got your Bucket list sorted or just do what you want to do and damn the consequences. 😊x
      Xmas on your own can be good fun, though- no compromising with what anyone else wants to do!

      Ahh, think you may have misunderstood my post above- it was my Gran who had MND, not me. She passed from it in February, but the emotional affects of being her family carer from months before she was diagnosed until her passing are still plaguing me.

      Nevertheless, I do indeed have a bucket list- watching a loved one battle with MND and others in the family having been unfortunate enough to succumb to other such terminal illnesses (my auntie passed from cancer last year), it's definitely taught me to live life to the fullest! x
      "This, too, shall pass"

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by Broostine93 View Post
        Hi Everyone,

        It's been quite some time since I've had chance to come on the forum. I must say, I am incredibly saddened to hear of so many 'familiar faces' that are no longer with us.
        I hope the rest of you are doing as well as you possibly can (and a very Merry Christmas to you all!)
        I just really wanted to pop my head in and say hello
        Things have been quite difficult for me, emotionally, since around September- seems MND really took a hit, but decided to wait a few months after Gran's passing to rear it's ugly head. I'd been prescribed some beta-blockers to control some panic attacks and general anxiety that seemed to be with me constantly- things are only just starting to get better for me now (annoyingly, it's all health-anxiety-related; not surprising, under the circumstances). I was on the waiting list for CBT via the NHS, but couldn't wait, so I attempted to apply the same techniques by myself- luckily, it seems to have really helped and I no longer feel I need the help of a professional (yay).
        It's very strange, but my mind doesn't seem to let me think about Gran very often- I don't know whether it's because the experience of losing her was just too traumatic for my mind to handle or whether it's because I spent so long in the anticipatory grief state that my mind has just said 'enough'. I'm sure, with time, I'll be able to 'let' myself think about her a lot more. Which brings us nicely into Christmas- it was always Gran's favourite time of year. She would decorate her house like a grotto, feed mountains of food to any guest that arrived and bought so many thoughtful gifts for her friends and family. I really wanted to celebrate this year, in her memory, and go all-out with the decorations, but a surprise (happy) twist in the year hasn't made it possible.
        I'm currently sat at my dining room table (I'm meant to be working, but would rather talk to you lovely people!), surrounded by boxes!
        My fiancé and I were planning on buying a house this year, having saved very hard for the last 4 years. Well, in September, we finally found one that we love!
        It's a new build, on the border of the Cotswolds, and we've been given a fixed date for completion next Friday Nice Christmas present, for sure!
        In hindsight, it probably wasn't the smartest idea for us, having both recently been through the losses of close family members (Gran on my side and my fiancé's Dad died suddenly in June), to go through the utter stress that is involved with a house purchase. However, we were both of the opinion that, considering we've both had a really rubbish time of it this year (and a couple of years before that, due to my Mum having passed away, too), we just had to finish this year on a high (start next year as we mean to go on, kind of thing).
        I'm sure, given the circumstances, Gran wouldn't have minded my omitting to put the Christmas tree up, this year (we're having double-Christmas next year, to make up for it!)
        As expected, none of the other family members have been in touch this year- I am not giving any of them my new address and I will be omitting them from my life completely (social media, phone and such-like). I'm only surrounding myself with positive, lovely people, from now on
        I'd love to hear from you all- please do let me know how you're all getting on <3

        Chrissie xx
        Hi Chrissie, wishing you all the best in your move, wish all the very best happiness 😊 good luck. Janette x
        Janette x

        Comment


          #5
          Nettie Hello Chrissie
          Good luck with your move Friday...
          Have lots of fun on your moving day and try to enjoy the process...
          Let us know how you get on
          I have the ability to cope with this and I can still be the best person I can be. This is my life - if I am happy others around me are happy too

          Comment


            #6
            Hi chrissie
            good luck with the move and I hope the new house is just perfect. Wish you both a happy future together.
            Denise xxx

            Comment


              #7
              Hi Chrissie , I hope the move went well and that you will be happy in your new home. For me it's the second Christmas since I lost Mick. It will be 18 months on the 3rd January. Christmas was his favourite time of the year. I miss him every day. I too was having support Chrissie through the hospice. I had finished counselling and I was on complimentary therapy/chat. I had one appt left when lockdown started but had also just had one Monday evening at a group session. I wish everyone well on here. I check in most days.

              Comment


                #8
                Thank you so much everyone <3

                Got the 'home demo' (first look inside the house) this afternoon

                shrew Same here, I only had 1 appointment left before lockdown started- could have really made good use of that session right about now, I must say!

                Love to you all xx
                "This, too, shall pass"

                Comment

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