Front Door

[Lynne K]

I’m waiting for the Council to change our front door back to wood (since they put very nice brown plastic in when they widened the opening about eighteen months ago). The North West Adaptive Technologies can install a remote open and close system but only to wooden doors and frames. I’ve had terrible trouble opening and closing our door when I’m in my wheelchair so having a car-like remote key will make this so easy. But council wheels turn extremely slowly. They said that they have to assess me first and need an OT or other professional to request this. My OT sent a message to the council OT yesterday. She said that she’ll let me know when she gets a reply. But our experience of that OT is awful. She never picks up her phone and seldom replies to messages. We all (me, Steve and my OT) experienced her lack of communication and lack of any response when me and Steve first moved in.

Steve doesn’t want this because it’s “less secure.”That’s his priority obviously when my needs and quality of life are secondary. Go figure 😣 Lynne

[denise]

Oh Lynne.

How annoying. Something to make your life easier and he has to come up with something to ruin it. Can't you get an alarm or something that goes off if there's an intruder. There must be an answer to that if he's so fussed. Suggest a guard dog.

you should come first. You could fall out of your wheelchair trying to get put the door.

love and hugs Denise xxx

[Suefromwakey]

Lynne not quite the same I am sure but my garage door is remote control and its uPVC.............perhaps an actual house door needs to be thicker for the security?

[Lynne K]

When Steve was in the garden working away a few days ago trying to get it in order I was asleep in my chair (had a bad night). When I woke up I realised that he was gone. I went to look out of my bedroom window and before I could get to the window with my walker I had to move several awkward heavy things out of my way, that he’d put there (thoughtlessly). I looked through the window and saw that it was a lovely sunny day and he was outside. I wanted to be outside too. His phone is seldom on him so no possibility of getting help and I wouldn’t have wanted to drag him away from what he was doing anyway. So I got in my wheelchair (after taking out of the wheelchair things that he’d put in it. It’s like swimming through treacle trying to do something with all of his dumped things in my way). Put my iPad in it’s holder on my wheelchair so that I could read whilst getting some sun. This all took lots of time.

Then I drove to the front door. Not easy to get out of our front room. Then had to turn the key that Steve had left in the door, on his key ring. That was really hard, made harder by the weight of his bunch of keys.

Finally out of the door I had to turn around and try to shut the door. In case you’re wondering we don’t have a back door and our side door from our kitchen has a step. The council’s refused to put a ramp there, telling me that I had to go out to the back garden via the front door, onto my ramp and drive around the flat to our back garden.

It took me about six tries and several bumps into the
door and the wall to close the door. I could have damaged my wheelchair, the door or the wall. The door is against the right hand hall wall when it’s open. My wheelchair control is on my right too. I cannot use the control and get hold of the handle of door at the same time. Also the lintel is not flat so I have to power over it. But to get hold of the door handle I’d have to be static. I felt like it needed me to be a contortionist but I did it eventually. Not a pretty sight. I was wacked and faught off being emotional.

All in all it had take me about 40 minutes and it was then that I decided to f—k what Steve wants and request a wooden door so that I could have my solution. I’m exhausted just thinking about this event, Lynne ☹️😣😢😰🥵

[Gordan1111]

My wife has a casual attitude to security. Leaving key in door etc ... Used to irritate hell out of me. Doesn't seem to matter any more

[Ellie]

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Good for you Lynne!! xx

[Lynne K]

Gordon, Steve thinks it’s more secure with his key left in because a key cannot be put in from the outside. Lynne

[Suefromwakey]

Lynne what a pain and a dilemma, hope you managed to get some sun after all the faffing

[Lynne K]

Yes Sue, I did thanks. We had our lunch outside too which was nice, even for just a sandwich. Lynne x

[denise]

Good on you Lynne. Get what you want and need. 🙄

[Lynne K]

Good on you Lynne. Get what you want and need. 🙄

Thanks x

[matthew55]

You could try walkie talkies! 😁😁😍x

[EvelynMW]

Lynne K - what a supportive husband you have; i am so sorry

[Mary C]

Hi Lynne,
sounds like your Steve needs a bit of awareness about how vulnerable you are without having to move all the obstacles out of the way.
My husband..Steve loves being in the garden but realises he has to have his mobile with him as if I am upstairs I can’t get outside as rely on manual wheelchair.Powered chair has come and plan to see if I have room on the landing to get from lift to toilet and bedroom this weekend.
Its a worry if your husband doesn’t have the mobile to hand.Hope for an emergency you can summons help and maybe you have a lifeline.Bear in mind if key left in the door and you needed help in an emergency nobody could gain access.The lifeline installer reminded us not to leave a key on inside of locked door .

Would a portable ramp go over the step to the side door..?I know it’s means buying one but it could be a solution.
Best wishes
Mary

[Lynne K]

Thanks Mary. I wouldn’t even be able to get into our kitchen with either of my wheelchairs (any wheelchairs). It’s hard enough with my walker (which I’m just about managing with). Council planning sucks. Steve makes it harder for me to get in with my walker because he puts things by the door, just inside or just before. I have sympathy for him as the kitchen is so small that there’s hardly enough room for things.

About the side door: the step is deep and beyond it there’s common land. Directly in front of the step is the path that goes all around the flat. This is used by both us and the upstairs flat for getting to our back gardens. That’s why the Council won’t do a ramp (stupidly designed flat again). With a bit of clearer thinking in the Council planning we could have had a door from our kitchen out to the back. The layout of our kitchen would have been better too with the door on the back wall, next to the sink which seems a more common option.

About the key left in the lock on the inside of our front door: I’ll broach that another time because he’s still coming to terms with my request to the Council to change our front door.

I do have a very loud alarm that only needs a little press to set it off. Steve wants me to pin it to my clothes. But it’s cumbersome with the device; it’s wire and the battery pack. It would be a nuisance whilst I’m still using my walker, I always have my mobile phone on me and I’ll broach again about Steve keeping his on him. But he’s very resistant to that and he’s (sometimes) easily vexed. I have to pick my moments and avoid the eggshells and other big traps. Diplomacy is the name of this game (or dance) which is sometimes extremely tiring. But it’s what it is, cannot be changed so I make the best of it, and don’t dwell. He does lots of nice, and sometimes sweet things for me which make it all bearable.

Love Lynne x